The Horror... The Horror

So the Army has decided to change their uniforms. And my first thought is... this would not have been possible before the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell..." policy took effect. Wouldn't commenting on the fashion of the military pretty much out them?

Honestly, who gives a fuck? As long as they're not goose-stepping with metal pikes on top of their heads, I don't see how what the military wears is any concern of any person in this nation-- Army, Navy, Air Force, Marine, Coast Guard, or civilian.

But if you really want a debate about this-- and I'm sure some of you do-- I'd be willing to shoot down any ideas you might have about this, if only so I can extend my blog into it's traditonal 14,000-word, have to get up to go the bathroom four times while reading, somebody make it end, how long can this guy go on about nothing length.

Veterans are pissed because it means an the end of the tradtional drab green they've come to know and love. I actually read one veteran refer to the "pinks and greens"-- he is so outed, now.

Traditional? Let's think about this for a moment. The actual traditional colour for the Army of the United States of America is blue. It was the colour General Washington chose during the American Revolution-- the start of American Armed Forces History-- to differentiate from the tea-taxing, dental hygiene-hating, lime-sucking Redcoats. When we speak of the American Civil War we don't talk about the Olive Drab Green and the Whatever We Found In Our Closet-- it was the Blue and the Grey.

So if you're going to make that arguement, you must be prepared to answer questions about how the veterans of those wars felt when we switched to green. And quite honestly, you don't know-- all you care about is yourself and the trauma you suffered in Vietnam or the Persian Gulf. Don't forget, veterans in other wars suffered the same, they just didn't have a hyphenated, eight-syllable term for it.

And if you really want to continue to wear green, fine-- wear your camouflage. You still have your brush cammies-- which are green-- to go along with your sand cammies (brown) and your seldom-used ice cammies-- which, by the way, are blue and white. And you can always jump into your green tanks or jeeps and drive away.

So in all seriousness, can anybody come up with a decent reason why any of us should care that the army is doing away with green?