A Look Back: A Propaganda Post

OK, we've recently blamed someone for the continuation of my blog-- I know people read, I know people love what I write. But of course, I never expected it. I was very skeptical about starting a blog-- who really cares what I think? And I knew it wouldn't be a daily thing-- who really has time to blog every day?

But if you want to know who to blame for 'Internet Hell' (as I referred to it in my first blog entry)... talk to Matty and AJ.

Back in May, I went on what AJ referred to as a "Ruthian streak of Biblical Proportions" on his blog. He, with Matty's help, pretty much convinced me the time was right to start my own blog.

And now, the football gods have smiled upon me. Michigoon vs. the Felons in the A-LAME-O Bowl. With the stage set, we now bring to you what our favourite Husker-H8R, AJ, once called "the best rant [he's] read all year." (I made AJ proud.)

Enjoy.


I don't know who I hate more... the Fucking Weasles or the Fucking Felons? Right now, I think I hate the Nebraska State Pennitentary Felons... er, I mean the Huskers more, simply because there is nothing to do in this god-forsken state but hear the hype. Wow, you got some good high school footballers to come to the most boring state in the union-- come on, at least you can ski in Utah. But much like how college talent does not always transfer to the pro ranks, high school talent does not always transfer to college. I swear these places that ranking HS talent do so based on how many women they've banged, how many illigitimate children they have, how many times they've been to jail for beating their girlfriends, or someone who looks like they thought of looking at their woman, and the number of keg stands they've done at parties-- then again, those types will fit right in, at Lincoln. Fuck sakes, they have a rehab clinic named after the team-- what the hell does that say? I am not impressed by the media coverage of that team, and I must say it says a lot about many people here that they live and die by Felon football.

Have you ever noticed how any time the Felons lose, it suddenly becomes "Depression Awareness Week" in the state of Nebraska? Get over yourselves you whining fucking maggots!

Now don't get me wrong, I have an extreme hatred for the Weasels as well. We just don't have to deal with them as frequently-- we can control out exposure to them by simply avoiding USCHO and other sources of college hockey news. I still belive Alvaro Montoya's legs spread wider than the captain of the cheerleading squad at the senior prom. But the biggest problems with the Weasels are the same problems with the local Felons-- complacency and the righteousness given to them by morons.

Obvoiously, we at UNO are not taken seriously. They could care less what a school like UNO does-- and anytime the Mavericks achieve any level of greatness it is met with a lacluster pat on the back, followed by being considered malcontents. "That's nice, now get your asses back in line, where you belong." As you can see, one leads to the other.

Anybody remember when the Huskers were discovered to be in violation of a few NCAA rules? It was a bigger coverup than Cardinal Law and the Archdiosces of Boston. They sent the swimming program out as the sacrificial lamb, yet said "they were not the only program at UNL in violation." What the fuck do you think that means? It means, we know the football team has fucked up to, but to admit it would kill off 75% of the population of this state. I got news for you, it's called natural selection-- let it go, if you can't handle the Felons being cheaters, than rid this world of yourself. I'll buy the rope, I'll even kick the chair out from below your feet, you just find the rafter in your barn.

...And not so fast there Weasels. You have problems of your own. And just because they go back to the "Fag Five" and the basketball program doesn't mean your hockey program is safe. The Omaha area is full of transplants from Illinois-- all of whom know that anytime an Illini team gets good, you and the Fuckeyes find a reason to put them on probation. How does it feel now? You are about to meet your maker, and the sky is about to fall on you. Your football program is next, and then we are going to come after Skeletor, Alvaro (and his five hole, which will now and forever be referred to as the Windsor Tunnel), and the rest of the group at Yost Ice Arena, and we here at UNO are going to laugh our asses off when it happens.

By the way, nobody plays basketball or anything else in your precious arena-- I think its time you found someone else to name it after-- perhaps a hockey player, I mean you've have hundreds of players come through your program and made it to the NHL, including your legendary coach. Perhaps, you could honour one of them. Skeletor Arena at Yost Field House

The day of reckoning is upon the two greatest evils in the world. It is only a matter of time before your imperfections become common knowledge, and when it does, I hope the NCAA give you both the same death sentence that was handed down to SMU in the '80s. Fuck you very much.

There's a knock at the door, you weasles-- and it's Elmer Fudd... huuuuhuuuuuhuuuuhuuuu.

And is that the sound of a poilice siren I hear-- better start running you damn felons, run like they're paying you to-- oh wait, they are!