Allow Myself to Introduce Myself

From the same people who built a bridge to nowhere (I-480 and Dodge/30th), and used to have the only interchange where you actually had to exit to stay on the same road (I-80 at the I-480/US-75 exchange) comes a real doozy. Or is that snoozy?

In all of it's infinite wisdom, the City of Omaha is buying new manhole covers which now resemble the Omaha City seal. The design isbacked by the Omaha Chamber of Commerce in effort to sell people on the city of Omaha. It is all part of a push to bring more people to Omaha.

So, let me get this straight. To bring more people, and more money into Omaha, we are doing something that might (and I can't stress might enough) get the attention of a few casual walkers in the Old Market? Am I missing something? Shouldn't we be trying to bring people to Omaha from outside the city?

I'm not talking about me-- living all of 25 feet from city limits. I'm talking people from Sioux City, Kansas City, Denver, Des Moines, Chicago, Minneapolis. Shouldn't they be our target audience?

Surely we could have thought of more obvious marketing campaigns. Ones placed outside of city limits, where people who aren't normally in Omaha might see them.

Think: Wall Drug. Where do you start seeing signs for Wall, South Dakota? I know they are prevalent throughout Minnesota, but I wouldn't be totally shocked to find out there are a few in Wisconsin.

And it works. I can remember my father saying he'd be damned if we were going to stop in a tourist trap, like Wall. But by the time you get there, and you realize there isn't much else around-- you stop. Wall Drug built itself on free water. Everyone else in Wall (and the surrounding area) offered free water, but Wall Drug advertised it.

This is as bad of an idea as when 'O!' replaced the (very) brief slogan: 'Omaha: Rare, Well Done'. About three years ago, the city started painting red 'O!'s on the streets. I can only remember where one of them was (72nd and Dodge), but I can also tell you I have no idea if it's still there. Like the manholes, most of us around here drive too fast to notice or care they exist.

So apparently people are supposed to come to Omaha to come see the fancy new manhole covers-- all of them with the city seal on them. Thanks, I'll pass.

But I do have an idea. There is a way to turn manhole covers into a tourism draw. Right now the U.S. Treasury and U.S. Mint are pumping out state quaters. Perhaps if Omaha were to make manhole covers in the designs of the back (tails side) of the quarters, people might come to check it out. You don't even have to stop there-- do this with all coins... maybe even international coins. You know people would come to check that out. Heck, they'd probably even try to steal them. And when they try to steal them, you throw the book at them-- huge fines, money that goes to the city. You're spending money to make money.

That is rare, and well done. You see, you have to think these things through.