What Possesses You?

So, it's been a while since I last blogged. Dead week and Finals week will do that to you. I've just been burned out. But I have have some random musings running through my mind of late, and almost all of them come back to one basic question-- what possesses people to do these things?

For starters... who invented bowling, and what possessed them to do so. We can ask this about almost every sports... but I want to know who had so much time on their hands to lay down 75 feet of wood, then place 10 wooden sticks at one end of it, and hurl a cannonball at the sticks?

And are Canadians so enviornmentally aware, or restricted resourcefully that they only have 5 sticks and hurl a shotput?

How much drinking was involved to invent golf? How much drinking was involved in the invention of any sport?


Explain this one to me. People get overly offended by mention of Nazis and the sight of swaztikas. Yet, there is an abundant population in this nation who are broud of being "rednecks".

I gotta say, it's a two-way street. Either the historical standing of both is acceptable, or it's not for either.

I know there are still some sick and demented people who believe the Nazi was the right way. And I feel the same way about people who brandish the Stars and Bars of the Confederacy.

Why? Because the Nazi Party and the Confederacy were founded on similar principles-- that there is a supreme race. In case you missed it, there is a very well-versed document in Washington, D.C. that reads "...all men are created equal." Perhaps it is only the law of this land, but it is widely accepted internationally, as well. Therefore, if you support what the Confederacy stood for in the middle of the 19th century, you are no better than Hitler and his Aryan ways.

I can't understand why we permit such a travesty. We permit people to display the Stars and Bars-- how does it differ from a swaztika? Ask someone of African-American discent how they feel about the Conferdate Flag... you'll get the same answer if you ask a Jew about a swaztika.


Speaking of possessed... what is up with Quinn Snyder? I swear he is controlled by his hair. He looks like the little Dutch boy from hell. He looks like he stuck his finger in a dyke-- if you know what I mean. Now that Gene Keady has retired, Snyder has the worst hair in college basketball.


What possesses people to be so rude? It only takes an extra second to be courteous. You should take pride in people's accomplishments, not try to render a dark picture about it. And of course, is takes less muscles to smile than it does to frown. Cheer up, people. Be nice. And enjoy life.


...And finally from the WTF file... Has anyone ever questioned my students are given final exams? Seriously, why make us memorize everything you taught us during the semester? In the real world, if we don't know the answer-- we can always ask... or better yet, find a book and look up the answer. Who are these teachers that force us to take finals? It just doesn't make any sense to me.


If I don't blog before then, enjoy the holiday season. Happy Winter, Merry Christmas, Happy Chanukah, Happy Boxing Day, Enjoy Kwanzaa, Have a Tip-Top Teht, a Solemn and Dignified Ramadan, and of course a Happy and Safe New Year!

A Blast from the Past

This weekend seemed like a "This Is Your Life" show for me.

I spent most of my weekend at the ice rink, as is the norm this time of year. But every game I worked involved a team from Ames-- where I first started working as an official.

I love it when teams from Ames are in town. I know people, they know me, and it's just one big reunion for me. The first person I saw when I got to the rink? Mr. Owen-- the Advisor for Iowa State's Club Hockey Team. He was also the partner I was paired up with for my first hockey games as a referee.

Things like that take me back.

Six years ago, I was at Iowa State, studying Architecture. I was a red-shirt. I got my reps playing for the JV squad. But I also served as the Undergradate Assistant to Coach Murdoch. At the end of the year, I was struggling academically, and unsure about where I stood with the hockey team. I faced a major decision-- would I return to ISU for my sophomore year?

After discussing my situation with Coach Murdoch, we made the decision for me to take some time away from school, and go play junior hockey. Coach Murdoch believed I had the potential to not only be a four-year starter at ISU, but even to play D-1 hockey. His final words to me before I left his office that day: "If we go [D-1] varsity, you'll be the first in line for a scholarship." He fully expected me to return to ISU.

ISU's hockey team still has not reached the D-1 level. There have been recent rumours that they might be headed in the direction. But even if they do, I'm no longer eligible to play for them. Still, I'd like to see Coach Murdoch take the program to the next level.

However, they face a major obsticle. Title IX. When I arrived in Ames, the Cyclones faced the task of becoming compliant with the government mandate that there be the same number of opportunities for women as there are for men. Instead of adding a program or two, the dicision was made to cut baseball and I believe another men's program (and I can't remember which program it was).

Based on that story, my initial response to Title IX was anger. You generally don't think that women participate in sports in the same numbers that men do. You also think that if a woman was good enough to play for a men's team, that the scholarships labled as "Mens" would be available to them. Unfortunately, that implies that coaches are not sexist.

Nonetheless, I was upset that a rule that made no sense to me at the time, screwed me out of a full-ride, or the potential for one. I've moved on. I made it back to college hockey at the D-1 level, and I have no regrets.

Then I realized something. There is another solution. And it's been mentioned in the state of Iowa. Several months ago, a state senator from Ames recommended to the Iowa State Legislature to cut the number of football scholarships from 85 to 70.

I don't know all of the details of the plan, but it's a leap in the right direction.

He just got the number wrong. Don't cut ten scholarships, cut 30 scholarships from football. Why 30? Because that brings the number of scholarships available for college football down to 55.

Do you know how many players are on the active roster of NFL teams?

53.

Why should a college team pay more players than a professional team? This does not prevent teams from rostering a full roster of 110, or whatever that number is anymore. It just brings the number of scholarships down to a reasonable number.

Think about this great quote from Donnatella Moss (Janel Maloney) from "The West Wing": There are 53 players on an NFL team. The University of Colorado has 130, 85 of whom are on full scholarship. I'm all for backups and substitutes but can't the guy who's fourth on the depth chart at right outside linebacker also be the fourth on the depth chart at left outside linebacker? If a college football team cut back to 70 scholarships, they'd still be three deep at every position and have a fourth-string punter and place kicker. 15 scholarships ... that's a wrestling team!

18 scholarships is a hockey team. 9 scholarships is a baseball team. That's 27 scholarships combined. In the case of Iowa State, they could field both programs if they cut football scholarships. Think about it... you're not effecting the amount of revenue the football team draws for the athletic department, you're just not allowing them to waste as much money.

I love the concept of Title IX. Equal Opportunities for everyone. That's right, everyone. Not just football players... EVERYONE.

And if you don't believe Title IX is a great idea... talk to the 20 women on UNO's Soccer Team, who just won a National Championship. They're a Title IX program-- the soccer progam was started when UNO added it's men's hockey program.

Funny how things work out like that.

A Look Back: A Propaganda Post

OK, we've recently blamed someone for the continuation of my blog-- I know people read, I know people love what I write. But of course, I never expected it. I was very skeptical about starting a blog-- who really cares what I think? And I knew it wouldn't be a daily thing-- who really has time to blog every day?

But if you want to know who to blame for 'Internet Hell' (as I referred to it in my first blog entry)... talk to Matty and AJ.

Back in May, I went on what AJ referred to as a "Ruthian streak of Biblical Proportions" on his blog. He, with Matty's help, pretty much convinced me the time was right to start my own blog.

And now, the football gods have smiled upon me. Michigoon vs. the Felons in the A-LAME-O Bowl. With the stage set, we now bring to you what our favourite Husker-H8R, AJ, once called "the best rant [he's] read all year." (I made AJ proud.)

Enjoy.


I don't know who I hate more... the Fucking Weasles or the Fucking Felons? Right now, I think I hate the Nebraska State Pennitentary Felons... er, I mean the Huskers more, simply because there is nothing to do in this god-forsken state but hear the hype. Wow, you got some good high school footballers to come to the most boring state in the union-- come on, at least you can ski in Utah. But much like how college talent does not always transfer to the pro ranks, high school talent does not always transfer to college. I swear these places that ranking HS talent do so based on how many women they've banged, how many illigitimate children they have, how many times they've been to jail for beating their girlfriends, or someone who looks like they thought of looking at their woman, and the number of keg stands they've done at parties-- then again, those types will fit right in, at Lincoln. Fuck sakes, they have a rehab clinic named after the team-- what the hell does that say? I am not impressed by the media coverage of that team, and I must say it says a lot about many people here that they live and die by Felon football.

Have you ever noticed how any time the Felons lose, it suddenly becomes "Depression Awareness Week" in the state of Nebraska? Get over yourselves you whining fucking maggots!

Now don't get me wrong, I have an extreme hatred for the Weasels as well. We just don't have to deal with them as frequently-- we can control out exposure to them by simply avoiding USCHO and other sources of college hockey news. I still belive Alvaro Montoya's legs spread wider than the captain of the cheerleading squad at the senior prom. But the biggest problems with the Weasels are the same problems with the local Felons-- complacency and the righteousness given to them by morons.

Obvoiously, we at UNO are not taken seriously. They could care less what a school like UNO does-- and anytime the Mavericks achieve any level of greatness it is met with a lacluster pat on the back, followed by being considered malcontents. "That's nice, now get your asses back in line, where you belong." As you can see, one leads to the other.

Anybody remember when the Huskers were discovered to be in violation of a few NCAA rules? It was a bigger coverup than Cardinal Law and the Archdiosces of Boston. They sent the swimming program out as the sacrificial lamb, yet said "they were not the only program at UNL in violation." What the fuck do you think that means? It means, we know the football team has fucked up to, but to admit it would kill off 75% of the population of this state. I got news for you, it's called natural selection-- let it go, if you can't handle the Felons being cheaters, than rid this world of yourself. I'll buy the rope, I'll even kick the chair out from below your feet, you just find the rafter in your barn.

...And not so fast there Weasels. You have problems of your own. And just because they go back to the "Fag Five" and the basketball program doesn't mean your hockey program is safe. The Omaha area is full of transplants from Illinois-- all of whom know that anytime an Illini team gets good, you and the Fuckeyes find a reason to put them on probation. How does it feel now? You are about to meet your maker, and the sky is about to fall on you. Your football program is next, and then we are going to come after Skeletor, Alvaro (and his five hole, which will now and forever be referred to as the Windsor Tunnel), and the rest of the group at Yost Ice Arena, and we here at UNO are going to laugh our asses off when it happens.

By the way, nobody plays basketball or anything else in your precious arena-- I think its time you found someone else to name it after-- perhaps a hockey player, I mean you've have hundreds of players come through your program and made it to the NHL, including your legendary coach. Perhaps, you could honour one of them. Skeletor Arena at Yost Field House

The day of reckoning is upon the two greatest evils in the world. It is only a matter of time before your imperfections become common knowledge, and when it does, I hope the NCAA give you both the same death sentence that was handed down to SMU in the '80s. Fuck you very much.

There's a knock at the door, you weasles-- and it's Elmer Fudd... huuuuhuuuuuhuuuuhuuuu.

And is that the sound of a poilice siren I hear-- better start running you damn felons, run like they're paying you to-- oh wait, they are!