Have you no decency? Have you no pride?

I've been stewing over this for a couple days. And the more I think about it, the more pissed off I become.

I went to a party hosted by a friend last weekend. He had gotten there much earlier, been drinking, so I'm hoping this was just the effects of his consumption of alcohol. I get to the party, and my friend is the only person I know. By the time I left, most people knew me by name-- but they didn't know me. Why not? Because everytime my friend would introduce me to someone, he'd tack on a lie about me. I'm sure he thought he was helping me with the ladies-- but I really didn't need it. I'm not the type to live a lie.

Now, I wouldn't say he was flat out lying-- he was more exaggerating...and he's not the only person to do this, and normally I don't care if they lie about themselves or somebody else, but when the truth is skewed about me, not it's personal... and I have to take offense.

I found myself in the position of either letting it go, figuring I'll never see these people again; or denying what was being said, and making my friend look bad. I chose option one. And ever since, I've been wondering why people find it important to "boost" what they do, why they feel the need to misrepresent themselves to others.

Where is the pride, people? Why can't you be proud of what you do? Where is the guy, has worked 13 years as a garbageman-- and loves every minute of it? Perhaps that person never expected to live beyond the age of 15. Maybe that garbageman is an environmentalist, who loves cleaning up this great planet of ours. Why can't he be proud of what he does? I'm sure somewhere out there, there is a guy who is just like I described. He may have hit pretty low on some of our standards, but if he loves it, if he is happy with his life, then he has no reason to lie.

My biggest problem with the friend, this weekend, was a comment he made to me about something I had done. He said something along the lines of "your secret is safe with me" in reference to my hockey playing days. Dude, what the hell? You weren't there, you don't know exactly what I did while I was there. This is the pride I talk about-- I was in Sioux City on a tryout-- I played in a handful of preseason games-- yes, friend, I played. And I was told by Coach Hakstol that if he wasn't leaving to coach UND, I would have broken camp with the team-- maybe he was blowing smoke, but I can only go on what he tells me. Did I play in Texas? No. And I never said I played for them-- only that I was invited to camp, only to be told there wasn't a roster spot for me. Where is the pride? The pride is in who the goaltenders that kept me off that roster: one plays D-1 college hockey at Michigan and is a draft pick of the New York Rangers (Al Montoya), and the other also played D-1 college hockey and recently signed a contract with the Pittsburgh Penguins (Brandon Crawford-West). It took two guys, well on their way to professional careers to keep me off that team. There is no shame in that. I moved on. I moved on because there is no sense in looking back at what might have been.

The other thing is, I am a lot more humble than people give me credit for. And I understand that-- they don't know the whole story about who I am, where I came from, what I've been through. Do I use my experiences to give people insight into what I'm thinking? Yes. But for every reference I make to my playing days in junior hockey, or my time on the end of the bench at UNO, there are 3 or 4 other references I don't make about myself. Things like how I turned down an offer to play juniors in Sweden during my senior year of high school, the high school state record I set my senior year in soccer, or the breakup of my engagement.

Now think about this... had I gone to Sweden to play juniors, I would not have been available to set that state record my senior year, I would not have gone to Iowa State as a freshman in college because teams didn't want to take a chance on a goaltender who hadn't played juniors, I wouldn't have left Iowa State to go play juniors in Canada, and I wouldn't have met my ex-fiancee in Winnipeg.

Do I have some regrets. Sure I do, who doesn't? But life goes on, you find your path through life, and I think it has worked out just fine for me. There are positives and negatives to every situation, no matter who you are.

Hypothetical situation #1: Had I gone to Sweden, I probably would have come back to the states, and been a true freshman walk-on at UNO. But I would have missed my senior prom, and graduating with my friends of four years. There also would not be a state record on the books with my name on it. I opted to stay home, set a state record, and went on to ISU for a year-- UNO got Brian Haaland to walk-on.

Hypothetical situation #2: Had I gotten married, my life would be totally different. I would probably be back in Winnipeg right now, and I had considered just uprooting to move up there with her. That would have meant the end of my education, and the end of my hockey playing days. As it is, the January after our breakup, I got added to a D-1 college hockey roster... replacing Brian Haaland, who graduated.

And this is just the tip of the iceberg... there are so many more opportunities I passed on, other roads I could have taken, but I am content with who I am, and what I've done. My friend, you can tell people how I played juniors, and how I was a pen-stroke away from representing Germany in a junior tournament, or how I was offered a contract by a professional team in Germany, but certainly don't go telling people that I HAVE played minor-pro hockey. It's dishonest, it's not me, and I know I can pickup women on my own merits. I take much pride in the exploits of my life-- some would argue I show too much pride, but they have yet to get to know me.

And to the rest of you. Be yourself, and be happy with who you are. We all thought we would be the starting centerfielder for the Boston Red Sox (or whatever)-- but right now only one person is... and he looks like a flippin' caveman. There is no shame in being yourself. Be decent, be proud, and most of all... BE YOURSELF.